Wednesday 5 December 2007

I had a really bad dream, it lasted 36 years, 6 months and 9 hours

when-i-get-off-work

Click on image to enlarge

13 comments:

Unknown said...

White Cube? I don't associate with criminals.
Lovely work, this. I've suddenly realised that you're much cleverer than me.
I'm going to Camden Arse Centre this pm, but lost your number...

soulbrush said...

you are much cleverer, and this is all bloody well true.

Debra Kay said...

It's an unfinished work though-the big pay off never comes UNTIL YOU LEARN TO BE HAPPY WITH WHAT YOU HAVE.

Mr. Spock said it best-"the wanting of something is often better than the having". Vulcans are cool.

Anonymous said...

I am amused.

Stone Soup = What you need is what you get.

Steve said...

No one's cleverer than The Nads.

Camden Arse would've been good. Another time I hope.

Catnapping said...

I think that's a real problem with our culture...linear thinking. We seem to think in lines, where at some point, we land on X, and walk till at some other point, we get off at X....

We're socialized to think of the destination, rather than the journey.

Some of the happiest people I've met...have no goals other than to make the people in their lives comfortable.

I'm not talking about generostiy of money, actually.

...but generosity of time...and of self. Some people are patient with even the nastiest of strangers; they will spend hours every week sewing, reading aloud to children...to the blind, cooking, and/or donating time at the shelter; they smile at everyone - they acknowledge and validate...other humans...other souls; and they ask for nothing in return. They do not judge...and they forgive so quickly.

I'm not talking about martyrs...they have an agenda. They are about appearances. I'm talking about truly generous people...who live in the moment, every moment. They enjoy people. They enjoy life.

I'm not like that. I wish I was. God, how I wish I was.

For example....I can't count the number of times I've deliberately NOT acknowledged someone I though was a jerk...cuz maybe she was obnoxious - or making a bid for attention...so I made a point of denying her that attention. Why do I do that? What would it hurt to let her believe she's the center of the universe...since it's so plain that that's exactly what she needs?

And how many times have I pretended I didn't see someone, cuz I didn't feel like sharing my time with him/her?

I spent a lifetime working for the next big payoff. What a waste.

My time would have better been served to have loved more freely.

Steve said...

Hard to turn oneself into a 'just-being' person if you're a full-time projecting/introjecting soul 'Napping.

Said something similar when tutorialising one of my students last Friday, a 25 year old Chechnyan guy who was talking about how hard he finds it to just relax and spend time with people, how he's always desperately trying to fill his time usefully, SIGNIFICANTLY, and how this doesn't seem to be paying off for him.

I felt like saying: join the fucking club matey. But was probably more specious with my advice.

Catnapping said...

an interesting word, 'significant'.

it's sad that we're raised to believe we must be producing something...working on some large goal, in order to believe our contribution is significant.

it seems to me that the most significant decisions we make are those small decisions: smile/don't smile; nod/look away..open the door, lend a hand...hug back, glare, sniff, let go, accept...

- - - -

our advanced degrees...our years of formal education...all necessary because of our dependence on technology...and for what...to increase life spans? to increase an already over-populated population?

we keep 17-week-old (spontaneously-aborted-cuz-nature-works-that-way) fetuses alive...just cuz we can...

we keep cancer patients, writhing in pain, alive...just cuz we can - and old, old people who have outlived all their friends (some, even their children), alive...just cuz we can. and we've mandated this crap. we have laws against suicide. we have laws forcing medical personnel to torture infants...so that they'll live a life of shitty quality, cuz the natural system that aborted them for whatever problems they had...has been circumvented...just cuz we can.

and we call this a significant contribution to humanity.

ya know, i think it's sad that we're not still hunting and gathering...living communally, collaboratively, collectively. i think life is complicated, because we (as in - our species, we) made it so.

significance probably shouldn't be measured in the size of one's contribution to the mess we're in. maybe significance should be measured in the collective, general well-being of one's community. how happy are my neighbors? do they feel needed, appreciated?

and i think we're miserable, because we WANT to make the small contributions...the minute to minute little things.

Catnapping said...

jesus, that sounded preachy. i'm sorry for that.

Steve said...

I have no problem with preaching. But cuzzing offends the fuck out of me. Lingopedant that I yam.

Catnapping said...

yer certainly entitled to yer kwerks.

Anonymous said...

[ElizT away from home]
Playing with the cat helps.

Jeannetto said...

With my 15 minutes of internet time a week I do just skim down to the ones we me in them.

I miss the internet and your blog.